It’s felt like it has been a long and difficult trial facing my fears within the psychiatric and physiological community. Many people have misunderstood my position on the matter and have felt that I am adamantly opposed to any mental health treatment of any kind when that is in fact simply not true. My issues are primarily with psychiatric drugs designed to target your emotional state of mind, effectively numbing you to your own feelings and acting like everything is OK while suffering severe side effects you have been manipulated into believing are not the result of the drugs but your mental disorder.
A while back we had taken my daughter to a psychologist seeking help with some issues that we have been dealing with. The fear of what I went through had made it extremity difficult to even approach this Doctor and made it even more difficult to continue. I had written about out decision to stop seeing this doctor here.
I have been sharing things on Facebook recently about my feelings on the matter which has led to debates and arguments. I have been told that I am wrong and should stop writing off a practice that has clearly “helped” many people. I have been told that I have not done my research and If I would just read the other side of the issue then I would know that these drugs are not bad but rather they are good for me and my children. It would seem that once you have a position on any given issue if it does not conform to those who are on the other side of the issue then clearly I must be uneducated and have given into the fear mongering other reputable sources have put forth. I Have been told that if I would just talk to people, doctors and other professionals that have first hand experience with these drugs then I would know that I am wrong. I can’t help but wonder when taking a stand on an issue means that you are closed-minded and have not done you research on that particular issue. My own experience has been written off by those who oppose my side of the issue as non important and has no practical value to the debate. Despite explaining that I have read plenty of material praising these drugs and spoken to plenty of people who claim they have been helped by these drugs I am still too closed-minded to understand that I am wrong. In the same breath those who opposed my opinion on the matter in such a way will write off people like Dr Peter Breggin who wrote books such as Toxic psychiatry, Brain disabling treatment in psychiatry: drugs electroshock and the pharmaceutical complex, and Medication madness: the role of psychiatric drugs in violence, suicide and crime, and Talking back to Prozac, what doctors aren’t telling you about Prozac and the new anti depressants. He is not the only one however there is also Mind Drugs, Inc.: How Big Pharma and Modern Psychiatry Have Corrupted Washington and Destroyed Mental Health in America by Christopher M. Byron
This debating back and forth has not changed my mind but has rather only served to give me even more reason not to trust psychiatric medication and has heightened my anxiety relating to the subject. When you tell me I am wrong and that I will be putting my children’s welfare at risk if I refuse to accept your side of the issue it is honestly offensive and while your intentions may be noble and good, they cause more harm than good. It comes across as saying that you know better what is good for my children than I do and If would just stop being so closed-minded I would see that your are right and I am wrong.
We have recently decided to give the doctor another shot in the hopes that we can resolve the issues concerning our daughter and the struggles she is dealing with. While I will certainly take the blame for giving into the debates that have sparked on Facebook over psychiatric medication it has not helped my overall anxiety. To be honest I have become frustrated that these debates have even happened. I take the blame for that, posting anything on social media can result in conversations that we are not happy about. I’m a sucker for punishment and can’t seem to help myself when it comes to answering those who disagree with me. Something I know I need to resolve for myself.
I can only hope that with the upcoming appointment with this doctor I can avoid the anxiety that caused me to step back and stop seeing him in the first place. Isaiah 41:10 brings words of comfort to my tortured soul.
“Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.
There is that part of me that still fears, but rationally I know that he cannot proscribe medications as the doctor we are seeing is a psychologist not a psychiatrist.
God knows that I love my children and could not ever knowingly subject them to harm. I could not do so with a clear concise.
Mental health is not an exact science by a long shot. We know very little about the mind and how it works. Without a proper understanding that makes treating what is commonly referred to as mental health issues difficult if not impossible but I do believe that it is possible to do so without the need for drugs of any kind when it comes to mental health. There are solutions to the issues with plague the mind that do not involve chemical manipulation. Subjecting anyone to such a treatment is more harmful that good.
I love my children and while difficult to accept and embrace the mental health community, and while I am still skeptical that they can truly be of any help as they are very dependent on drugs, I am not closed-minded as many believe. That fact is evident in that I am willing to bring my daughter to a psychologist in the first place. Asking me to trust this man explicitly is something very different. Taking this step is not an act of trust, but rather an act of faith that my God will look out for me and my family.