A Brief Summary Of How My View On God Is Evolving

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Life is a journey filled with challenges along the paths we choose. Some paths we choose for ourselves, others are chosen for us.

Since leaving the LDS church I have struggled with the concept of God. Who is God? Does God truly exist? Do we worship God, even while he cares nothing for us? Does God care for us? What is the true nature of God?

For the first while after I left the church I spent time doing scriptures study with my family each day. Well at least most days we still did. We continued to read from the Book of Mormon for a bit, but I soon found myself struggling to just keep reading that book as it represented and still does everything that I had just left behind. I found myself feeling sick, not in the physical sense, but a kind of disgust at what I was reading. One of the last things I remember reading in the book of Mormon was the story of Moroni. A man who cared so much for liberty and freedom he was willing to slaughter and imprison any “dissenters” who disagreed with him. According to his story he forced others to bend to his will or be killed or jailed or both. This to me was not an act of liberty but an act of extreme tyranny against the people. This is a book held up as sacred scripture and the foundation of the church. Before I left the church I did not think much about this. I was a true blue Mormon and did not feel the need to question such teachings. At this point however I could not help but be disgusted at what I was reading. From what I had recently experienced with my local leadership, I felt that I could see such teaching in full force to the greatest extent the laws allowed being imposed on me as a “dissenter” over disagreements with some doctrines and policies.

Despite this I continued to read the Book of Mormon. For a short time I continued reading the Book of Mormon because I wanted to so badly believe that the doctrine and scriptures were true, but only that the church had become corrupted and was not being lead by Christ, at least not any longer. I just kept feeling worse and worse about reading it. Eventually I just could not do so any more and felt that I needed to stop. We changed over our scriptures to reading the bible as a family. This however did not help. As we were reading I still was feeling disgust at what I had been taught and believed. The bible was a big part of my religious upbringing as well. This sadly, makes it for me at least, very difficult to separate from the LDS church as that is the religious culture I was raised in.

I tried so hard to keep reading from church materials just thinking, there is good here it can’t all be bad. For a while I even continued to read LDS church magazines but finally I gave up on that as well. I was finding I just was not happy trying so hard to keep myself reading LDS church material. The thing is I really wanted to believe that the church was still good, and wholesome and lead by God. I really wanted to believe that because God lives his church must be true even if I could not align myself with leadership policy and practice.

There are so many things within the Bible that I have had a difficult time accepting as actually fact and truth. For many years I have struggled with this. Just to name a few examples are the story of Adam and Eve which does not make sense with what we know with scientific reality. This makes for some great theology but if taken in a literal sense it just does not seem possible. The exodus from Egypt is another one that has always troubled me. Not the leaving but the march through the wilderness. So much of the Israelite’s journey is filled with warmongering. Millions of innocents slaughtered while the women in some accounts were kept alive to be raped by the men. Women, children, innocent men senselessly slaughtered. Christ’s immaculate conception was a huge struggle knowing that pregnancy is impossible without men. It is biologically impossible for a woman to get pregnant without an injection of sperm. The story of Lot who offered his own daughters up to be raped rather than suffer men he just met to be harmed. Samson who’s behavior was anything but God like yet was somehow “blessed.” Reading the biblical account we are led to believe that all these things were sanctioned by God. In addition to that the fact that the bible was compiled from original source material of up to 70 + gospels, whittled down to 4 which were accounts written 70-100 years after Christ’s existence on earth by those who heard the stories from someone who heard the story from some one who knew him, and compiled by a pagan emperor Constantine with a political agenda. We just do not know what else was written or the truth about New Testament history. There are just so many problems with scriptural documents that do not make sense. This does not disprove God in any way but does call into question the credibility of organized religion’s source material.

The struggle I have had is that once I finally understood what the LDS church truly is, and how it’s entire basis is based on fraud, lies, deceit etc… and they are the one place that taught me about God, how can God exist (at least in the sense we think of God) if the church that claims his truth is false, then where is the truth to be found. If I can’t trust the church, then how can I trust the scriptures that the church claims as it’s truth?

I love God and believe that there are supernatural forces within the universe that are beyond our ability to understand. This universe and the world as we know it was created, regardless of the truth behind the force that created it, it was created and the fact of our and its existence is proof of that. My view on God has evolved and changed over the last year or so and most notably in the last couple of months it has undergone a rather drastic transformation of how I view God.

Faith, it has been said, is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things unseen. It has often been said that the evidence of our existence is the evidence of God. An Aunt of mine has often used the term God wink to describe convenient circumstances that come together right when we need it most. Perhaps this definition of faith and evidence of God’s existence is accurate. We are here because God created us. Mankind has worshiped divinity in our quest to understand that which we cannot explain. Evolving beliefs in a God are a natural part of this evolutionary progress. If we are to say that God created us, then we could say God is the force behind life and existence in the universe, whether or not this force is a literal divine person or a un-quantifiable universal energy that flows through everything and everyone we refer to this force as God.

Three major world religions, Muslam/islam, Jewish and Christianity view God as a singular deity of the male Gender. When looking at the history of God and the names often applied to them Jehovah (or yahweh in jewish) can be broken down into 2 parts. Je – which I have learned is reference to the male gender and Hova meaning girl or the female gender. Assuming that the root meaning of the word is accurate this literally means male-female. From Truth unity it states “Hebrew students say that the original word is JHVH. Which means the ever living male-and-female principle.” While the meaning of the name has evolved over time to mean different things at different times, the roots and origin of the name helps to shed a light on the origins of the name of God, or Christ as it is known in the New Testament. Along side this is the other often and widely understood name for God which is Elohim. This term however is actually in reality plural meaning many gods or deities.

elohim

So what we have here concerning the Christian/Jewish God is Jehovah or JHVH meaning male and female and Elohim meaning plural deities. As I continue growing and changing in my spirituality the idea of God being a multi gender and many person persona starts to evolve and form. This leads one to ask, who or what are we  truly worshiping and how does this form our beliefs from a spiritual perspective.

If we are to use the Bible as the basis for our explanation of who or what God is (though much of what is written it is difficult for me to take literally) then we can, despite some question about it’s accuracy, begin to see a pattern within the written words of the Bible as to what or who God truly is. We can see what the Bible is trying to tell us as we seek to improve our understanding. If we are prepared to have a more open mind about divinity and God, I believe we can come to a greater understanding of what or who God is. By doing this we can really take a close look at our own spirituality and seek to grow as people, individuals and understand our own divine destinies and potential.

The biblical accounts tells us that God created the heavens and the Earth. But at this point in the narrative it does not tell us much about who or what God is. Shortly after the creation we get our first glimpse behind who this God figure is in a way we can relate.

Genesis 1:26-27

26 ¶And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.

 27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.”

This tells us that God created us in the image of God. It tells us that both men and women were created in the image of God. As we established Jehova being the old testament name of God is the male-female principle. The bible states that humans were created in the Jehova. Both male and female and Jehova or male-female is God, and humanity is in the image or likeness of God. Thus God is both male and female in this sense. Humanity is also male-female.

Some other scriptures of note are also telling us something about the nature of the divine, the nature of what or who God is.

Psalm 82:6

 I have said, Ye are gods; and all of you are children of the most High.

Isaiah 41:23

23 Shew the things that are to come hereafter, that we may know that ye are gods: yea, do good, or do evil, that we may be dismayed, and behold it together.

John 4:15

15 Whosoever shall confess that Jesus is the Son of God, God dwelleth in him, and he in God.

John 3  1:11

 11 Beloved, follow not that which is evil, but that which is good. He that doeth good is of God: but he that doeth evil hath not seen God.

John 10:34-35

34 Jesus answered them, Is it not written in your law, I said, Ye are gods?

 35 If he called them gods, unto whom the word of God came, and the scripture cannot be broken;

Each one of these scriptures is telling us that we are Gods. The Book Of Genesis tells us that we were created after the Image of God. The Old testament Jehovah is a word meaning the male-female dynamic. And Elohim is plural meaning many deities. Most Christian and other religions teach that God or the Gods are separate and distinct beings of supernatural powers and abilities. Is this a truthful fact? Or is this a contrived doctrine of man to form the basis of a organized religion in an effort to explain what these scriptures mean? What is it that the scriptures are truly trying to tell us about the nature of God?

I would like to for a moment take a look at a couple of these verses in particular.

John 4:15

15 Whosoever shall confess that Jesus is the Son of God, God dwelleth in him, and he in God.

This scripture is telling us that if we acknowledge that Christ is the son of God we can then recognize or accept that God is dwelling inside of us, and we are dwelling in God. This suggests that the power of God is within us, that we are divine beings and all it takes is acknowledging that Christ is the son of God, then God will dwell in us and us in God. Thus we in effect become God or houses of God’s essence. In this sense we become Gods. Christ is also referred to the as the son of man, and also the son of God. God dwells in us and we are Gods, Christ being the son of God or man

John 3  1:11

 11 Beloved, follow not that which is evil, but that which is good. He that doeth good is of God: but he that doeth evil hath not seen God.

This verse suggests that if you have done those things which are good, then you are of God while on the other hand if you do evil, or wrong then you have not seen God. This suggests that we can literally see God when we do good or see good happening. These Good Works are performed by people. We see God when performing Good Works, thus by witnessing good works we are seeing God. We could only be seeing God if the people themselves are God made manifest in the flesh.

John 10:34-35

34 Jesus answered them, Is it not written in your law, I said, Ye are gods?

 35 If he called them gods, unto whom the word of God came, and the scripture cannot be broken;

In this scripture, Christ is speaking and telling us that we are God’s, and that the word of God came to those who are God’s and that the scriptures were not broken on this basis or fact. We are Gods and we have the word of Elohim (again I would remind you that this means many dieties) who is God, then we are receiving the words of Many Gods (and many have written the scriptures and were and are gods) who we are by this scripture.

Mathew 25:40

40 And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

Christ, within the scriptures, would often make statements like the one found in John 10:30 in which he states both he and the father (meaning God) are one and the same. With the scripture above he states that if we do good works we do these things unto him. If he is God, and we are Gods and we do good for others and we are doing that good in effect to God.

So lets summarize what we have learned

1: Humanity was created in the image of God

2: Jehovah means male and female principle

3: Elohim is plural meaning many deities

4: We can both have God in us and be in God

5: By serving and doing good to others we are serving God

6: We are Gods

So if we are in the image of God, and by God’s names God is both male and female and many, and based on the scriptures we not only serve God when serving others but we have God within us if we just accept the reality of God’s existence. This image of God based on the bible shows us that God is in reality us. We, the human species are many or plural both male and female and are God, or Gods. This religion or one version of religion is all about obtaining the God within our lives. God being the best parts of humanity and the human species as a whole. It is about joining both sides of the human species, both male and female to create Jehovah. We serve this purpose by serving others. Elohim, or the many created the world as we know it, and it is only through uniting both the male and female or humanities two half’s that we can achieve God, or Jehovah. Jehovah, or the joining of male and female, has been the ultimate objective of religion as a whole. This seems to be the pure truth. When Jehovah speaks it is the male-female that is speaking, asking us to follow the path that will lead to perfect unity and the ultimate God!

When all is said and done, I do not view myself as religious in the sense of subscribing to a singular faith or sect of any one religion. I believe Jesus Christ is real just as Mohammad, Ghandi and Buddha are real. Christ like other founders of other religions is a true and real person. I myself am not so much religious as I am more spiritual now.  All religions have some wonderful theology and good about them. I wish to embrace all that is good and wholesome and at this point I am simply trying to understand to a greater extent how to achieve that which we all seek. Our own perfection and happiness. Any principles or ideological ways of life that can help me attain that is good.

And that is the Gospel according to Andrew

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2 comments on “A Brief Summary Of How My View On God Is Evolving

  1. Saint Andrew:
    We certainly were dumped into the middle of this life to take it from there, and I think that Mother Nature (or Father God) is cheering for us. And I think that the one rule we need to follow is “Don’t give up.”
    Just as all Earth’s species interact, for food or other purposes with each other, we and the Universe are creating and co-operating to build all this, and without even knowing why, we are seeking the knowledge of good and evil,
    I ran into a thought once that I try to keep: religion may be answers that can’t be questioned, but spirituality may be questions that can’t be answered.
    If we are anything, we are spiritual. Everything that we undergo (I hesitate to say suffer), everything that we undergo is evidence that we are spiritual beings.

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